I hate thinking up titles.

I'm not in the best mood today. I have gained even more weight in the last week and I just can't figure out why. I broke 130 finally and its still climbing, 131.4 as of this morning, and morning is when I weigh the least. That's 14.5 pounds I have gained since August. Yes, I am obsessed with my weight. So is my mother. I don't feel like myself anymore. I feel like I am sinking in quicksand and my head is almost under. This obsession is part of who I am and I have learned to live with that. For the first time in a while I cried this morning, a symptom of feeling out of control. None of my pants fit me right anymore. I'm digging back into the ones I wore when I was pregnant and that depresses me even further. I tried to put on the ones I wore all summer that literally fell off me and I had to wear a belt with. I couldn't even get them over my thighs. I'm not pregnant as I just finished my period the other day, and I can't believe my metabolism would slow that quickly from age.

Anyway, on a different note, I've learned the secret of wire wrapping stones/glass drops for earrings, and I can churn them out pretty fast now. We'll see if anyone will buy them now...I'm not pricing them very high at least hopefully that will move a few of them out. Thanks to Sarah for my 51st sale :)

I just want to go home and crawl in bed. Last night Kris made me stay up until midnight which I really wasn't up for but I did anyway. I drank a half glass of wine (don't want to mix too much with the Vicodin...!) and he drank the rest of the bottle, and we worked on the puzzle he gave me for Christmas. When I got up for work this morning I felt like total shit and had a headache from a HALF glass of stinkin' wine. I didn't take any Vicodin or Flexeril today. My back is starting to feel a little better although it still hurts when i stand up from sitting down and walking around after I've sat a while.

Hopefully my next post will be a little cheerier than this one. Right now I just feel like disappearing...